


It Was Not My Lips You Kissed, But My Soul

by Sereko



Category: Glee
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-12
Updated: 2014-04-28
Packaged: 2018-01-08 12:44:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1132799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sereko/pseuds/Sereko
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When all it takes is a single kiss to reveal one's soul mate, one can either approach life by kissing everyone in sight or waiting to fall in love first. Blaine's curiosity makes him see that putting off the kiss isn't always the best policy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A fill for [this anonymous prompt](http://asdreamsmaycome.tumblr.com/post/73120309447) on tumblr: "You find out your soulmate by your first kiss with that person. Blaine’s dating Kurt and waiting for their first kiss. Blaine plays Spin the Bottle or needs CPR, etc and Sebastian ends up ‘kissing’ Blaine and turns out to be his soulmate."
> 
> _(Title taken from the quote by Judy Garland: "For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.")_

“Oh, get a room,” Kurt hisses under his breath as he walks down the halls of Dalton with Blaine. Between Econ and U.S. History, Sebastian has another eager innocent plastered against the wall.

He pulls back, having heard Kurt, and smirks at them. “Anywhere, anytime. Just name the place, Hummel.”

Kurt rolls his eyes, unimpressed.

“Come on,” Blaine tugs on his arm, “Let him be.”

Kurt reluctantly agrees and threads their fingers together as they continue on their way to class.

Blaine can feel Sebastian’s gaze at his back, but doesn’t turn around. Sebastian might think he has quite the set-up, but kissing every unbounded boy at Dalton runs cold for Blaine.

Everyone has their own ideas on what’s the best way to find one’s soul mate. When all it takes is one kiss, theories abound. Blaine and Kurt are of the mind that dating and relationships are still important to have before the first kiss. They want to feel love without the inevitability of it all taking away their control. Most people are of a similar mind, though kissing after the third date is a common time table.

Sebastian is from the camp who think dating is a complete waste of time. He doesn’t date. He kisses right after “hello, my name is” and if the soul bond doesn’t form, he walks away… or has casual sex – depends on his mood.

Kurt’s never gotten along with him, even after joining The Warblers. Blaine’s known Sebastian for longer, though, and mostly feels pity when he sees yet another lip-lock in progress. Sebastian’s broad shit-eating grins ring hollow.

As it does later that day in the flickering light of the common room fireplace. About half of The Warblers are still milling about. Practice ended an hour ago, but they have a big competition coming up and David is helping a few with their side-stepping.

Sebastian is sprawled out on one of the leather sofas, an arm slung arrogantly across the back. Kurt rams his legs on his way back from stoking the fire so Sebastian has to drop them from their perch on the recently polished coffee table to let him pass. Blaine hides a laugh behind his hand, then leans into Kurt’s side when he sits back down.

“Do you still have that test in Chemistry tomorrow?”

“No,” Kurt answers. “Mr. Kimball moved it to next week. Thank god. I still have to memorize half of the Periodic Table.”

“I can help this weekend, if you want. I kept my flashcards from when I had that class last year-”

“How long have you two been dating?”

Blaine blinks at the interruption. Sebastian looks thoughtful, not mean-spirited, so he allows the question. “Almost a year now.”

“Ten months,” Kurt specifies at the same time.

“And you seriously haven’t been tempted to kiss in all that time?”

“Of course we’ve been tempted,” Kurt scoffs.

“It’s not like we’re chaste. There’s a lot you can do without kissing,” Blaine adds. His cheeks redden. Last week they’d tried Blaine on top.

“Hrm.” And Blaine honestly can’t tell if Sebastian thinks they’re ridiculous or if he’s impressed. He doesn’t get to find out either, because Sebastian chooses that moment to go up to his dorm with a half-hearted wave goodnight.

“I will never understand him,” Kurt mumbles.

But Blaine understands. Or tries to. He knows there must be more behind Sebastian’s cavalier attitude than impatience. He often thinks it’s desperation. Not to get the kiss over and done with, but to find an end to loneliness. With the way he scowls when Kurt and Blaine hold hands or when Nick and Jeff – mated as of three weeks ago – sit in each other’s laps at lunch, envy is clearly a factor.

The next day dawns wet and cold and Blaine doesn’t even blame Sebastian when he has Clarence Stedman, a star on the lacrosse team, cuddled up on the couch in the break room. He hates himself for it, but he can’t help but pause in the doorway and watch.

The way their lips don’t slide so much as grasp, demand, beg for more. Their mouths open and close in breathless conversation. Their tongues drawing incoherent syllables from one another.

Blaine’s grip on his bag tightens.

For as wanton as their kissing is, the rest of their bodies remain practically prudish. Sebastian’s hands don’t even wander to back or thigh or ass.

It’s a laughable contrast. Blaine knows more of Kurt’s body than his own, has seen it undressed and writhing and slicked with sweat, and yet he doesn’t know the innocent pleasure of a simple kiss.

He and Sebastian are opposite sides to the same coin.    

“I think your way is worse,” Sebastian says one day while they wait for their teacher to start class. Blaine doesn’t turn away from his perusal of the day’s chapter when he responds with a curious noise.

“What good is being in love if he’s not your soul mate?”

Blaine almost snaps. His eyes light with fire, his heart thumps suddenly wild against his ribcage. When he turns to glare at Sebastian, however, he’s caught in another real moment. Sebastian hasn’t bared his teeth. He’s not even looking at Blaine. His chin is perched on his hand as he watches two doves flit around each other on a branch outside.

“Love is always worth it.”

“Is it? Won’t it just hurt more when you have to break up?”

“Who says we’ll have to break up?” Blaine lifts his chin. Sebastian laughs.

“I can’t tell if you’re being idealistic or idiotic. You mean to say you’ll ignore your soul bond and stay with Kurt anyway? I don’t think it works like that.”

“Kurt could _be_ my soul mate.”

“Oh, so it is idealism, then.” Sebastian pats his back in a rather patronizing way.

Blaine shrugs him off and turns back to the front of the room. His heart is still pounding loud and furious. It’s driven by fear, though.

He kissed a boy once. Long ago. They were young and eager and had tripped into love almost instantly and Blaine had been more devastated by the cool tingle of indifference when their lips met than the blood trickling out of him onto the asphalt in front of that dance hall.

“I hope for your sake you’re right,” Sebastian murmurs.

_I hope so too._

——

Spin-the-Bottle is more than a party staple, it’s practically a requirement. The silly game of kisses and giggles means so much more when there is the potential of true love after every spin.

Kurt and Blaine, and a handful of others, never play. Sebastian, obviously, always does.

Usually they watch, from the safety of the refreshment table – which in this case is the top of Trent’s desk and littered with potato chips and cheap booze, but Blaine can’t bring himself to enjoy it this time. He tries to go along with rolling his eyes like Kurt, but is unable to settle in his own skin.

The more Sebastian has unintentionally let slip in their brief encounters over the past few weeks, the more Blaine can only see aching loneliness in every kiss.

The games rarely ever end in a matched pair. The heightened emotion is still enough of a thrill for most, though. Blaine finds himself on pins and needles the entire time, leaning forward with hope each time the bottle lands on Sebastian and sinking back with exponential disappointment when no spark ignites.

Kurt nudges him with his shoulder half-way through. “You okay?”

Blaine feigns a smile and nods. “Just not feeling it tonight.”

“We can leave,” Kurt offers, squeezing his hand. He starts to stand, but Blaine finds himself suddenly reluctant to follow. He doesn’t want to admit that despite how miserable he feels, he still wants to stay to see if Sebastian will have any luck. Maybe tonight. Maybe.

“No, no, it’s okay. Let’s leave after this game.”

Kurt frowns, unconvinced, but sits back down and starts telling a story about Rachel’s latest exploits to get his mind off things. Blaine appreciates the distraction, even though his eyes never stray from a certain tall, lanky brunet.

The game ends with no matches made, yet with laughter and smiles regardless. Kurt sighs in relief. Blaine sighs in frustration.

“Hoping for a different outcome?” Sebastian asks, noticing the huff, as he walks up to grab a drink.

“For you, yes.”

Sebastian’s hand pauses in midair and he carefully replaces the bottle of Jack. He stares critically at Blaine for a long moment. Blaine meets his gaze after a quick look to Kurt who is engaged in a discussion with Wes.

“Well isn’t that sweet,” Sebastian smirks.

“Don’t. Don’t joke.”

“Joking’s all I got, kid.”

“No, it’s not.” Sebastian is frozen again, this time from the hand Blaine reached out to place on his arm. “You’re better than this, Sebastian.”

Sebastian’s mask softens to something vulnerable. “Never heard that before,” he breathes. Blaine’s not entirely sure he meant to speak the words out loud.

“Well, it’s true. You are. You don’t have to go throwing yourself at every boy in the school.”

“No?” His expression hardens a bit. “How else am I gonna find what you and Kurt have?”

Blaine splutters. Having only ever been teased for his relationship with Kurt by Sebastian, it takes a moment for him to process that he was right all along.  

——

“You gotta stop spying on me, Anderson.” Sebastian is still looking after his latest hook-up walking down the hall when he says it. Blaine startles from his spot behind the door and reluctantly enters the coffee lounge. It’s been three days since Spin-the-Bottle and Blaine hasn’t been able to get Sebastian out of his head.

“And you have to stop kissing every random boy in school.”

“It’s not random,” Sebastian counters flippantly. He pats the empty seat on the couch beside him and Blaine finds himself sitting in it.

“Please god, tell me you don’t have a chart in your bedroom that you check off every night.” Blaine shudders at the complete lack of care that implies.

“Know who I haven’t checked off?” Sebastian hedges, propping an elbow on the back of the couch by Blaine’s shoulder. Blaine’s pretty sure that means he actually does have a chart. Maybe even a schedule.  

For the first time since they’ve known each other, Blaine doesn’t immediately walk away from Sebastian’s advances. There’s something less frightening, less cruel, about it all now that he knows Sebastian’s hunt is for his soul mate and not endless notches on his bedpost.

Sebastian is clearly confused by Blaine’s withheld indignation and pauses when his head just enters Blaine’s personal space.

“Me.”

“What?”

“You were going to say that you haven’t checked me off your list,” Blaine only bothers to explain because he feels a bit triumphant at having stumped Sebastian. There’s a thrill running up his spine at doing the unexpected. Another thrill at the proximity of Sebastian’s nose, cheek… mouth.

What would it be like? To be kissed? To kiss someone?

It’s a question that pervades his every waking moment, something ignited when children are young and first told about soul mates. He remembers Sally Heins pecking him amidst a gaggle of girls on the blacktop in third grade. The heat of the afternoon had overwhelmed any sensation he might have had from the kiss.

Sebastian’s lips are mere inches away. Parted. Blaine wants to trace them with his fingers, see if he can pick up phantom feelings from others they have kissed. Would he be tender? Blaine has witnessed that he’s often passionate, but that’s after he knows someone hasn’t passed the test, what happens in that first moment before Sebastian is sure?

“Blaine?”

Blaine barely hears the questioning whisper. His ears are flooded with the rushing wind of focused decision. “Is it nice?”

“Kissing?” Sebastian sucks in a breath and Blaine reaches out as if to catch it. He doesn’t touch, though, just hovers an inch away – wanting, considering, taunting.

“Does it spark? Does your entire body come alive? Does your heart sear until its whole?”

“I wouldn’t know,” Sebastian says softly, unwilling to break whatever spell Blaine’s under. “I’ve never kissed my soul mate.”

Blaine surges forward with that. A man possessed with no thought beyond sating a lifelong curiosity. He’s charted naked skin, been held in the throws of ecstasy, and it’s been enough, always been enough. But he’s forever wondered.  

The kiss isn’t tender, only because Blaine is the one leading and his desperation pushes in hard and sudden. Sebastian falls back a bit into the couch and Blaine follows, unwilling to let their lips part now that he’s initiated this. At first, he’s surrounded by the scent of Sebastian’s skin, a hint of sandalwood tickling his nose where it brushes Sebastian’s cheek. Then, the feeling of his lips meeting resistance, the need to push and pry to see how pliable they are. Sebastian pushes back, only enough so Blaine doesn’t press him all the way into the couch, and he poises a hand curled around the back of Blaine’s neck, not holding him there, but wanting to and waiting until he can. His fingers brush the curls at the nape of Blaine neck and Blaine shivers.

The shiver is warm, though, flint having started a fire burning low from within. Blaine feels the heat travel up him. It circles around all his major organs, his heart, squeezing his ribs, breathing fire into the kiss that slips open-mouthed into something more.

It does spark. His body has come alive. And his heart feels double in size as it pounds against his breast.

He has his answers.

Blaine’s lips tingle as he pulls back. Sebastian seems apt to chase him, but he holds himself in check, his hand still warming the air behind Blaine’s neck. Sebastian’s eyes are wide, his pupils dilated, and Blaine takes a moment to feel impressed with himself for eliciting such a reaction in a man who does this every day.

“Is it always like that? No wonder you kiss people all the time.” Blaine is still close. His arms suddenly ache to hold. His body to envelop. He can’t seem to shake himself out of his daze.

“Blaine?”

“Yeah?” Blaine’s eyes are doing what he won’t let his fingers, tracing a path under Sebastian’s eye, past his temple, down the long line of his jaw. Sebastian patiently waits for their gazes to meet again.

“It’s not always like that.” His hand finally cups Blaine’s head, brings their foreheads to meet. He breathes deeply. “It’s not always like that,” he repeats heavily.

And maybe if Blaine’s skin hadn’t sparked at all the places where Sebastian now touched him. If his heart didn’t beat faster. If the empty cavern he’s carried around for seventeen years wasn’t suddenly filled with pure light. If he didn’t feel like he never wanted him to let go.

Maybe then he wouldn’t have believed it.

Soul mates.

“Oh god.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got a lot of requests for a sequel to my Seblaine soulmate!AU and couldn't resist obliging as I fell in love with my prompter anon's premise. Though, the thought of writing about Kurt discovering that Blaine isn't is soul mate was too heart-wrenching for me, so this takes place a few months after he transfers back to McKinley.

“I can’t believe you’re mine,” Sebastian says it into clean skin. They just got out of the shower after a surprisingly intense round of sex.

It wasn’t their first time. They’ve been together now for a little over three months and already had the sweetly moving kind of se– _lovemaking_ (because that’s what it is when the sentimentality of the moment weighs you down to your bones so you never push too hard or take too much or move too fast). But that was a few weeks ago and they’ve had sex – sometimes rough, always toe-curling – four times since then. Few enough that it’s still new and a bit nerve-wracking. The blood still runs a little too fast.

The benefit of being soul mates is that even though they have different personalities that occasionally lead them in opposite directions, they like to remain as physically close as possible. Which means cuddles. After-sex cuddles, pretending-to-study cuddles, sitting-in-each-other’s-laps-at-lunch cuddles. It’s a blissful enough thing they don’t even mind all the teasing they get from their friends.

——

Like later, when they’re hanging out in the rec room with the rest of the full-time boarders on a lazy Sunday afternoon.

“You’re staring again.”

Sebastian jerks in his spot on the couch and cranes his neck to see Hunter, who had approached from behind. “I can’t help it,” he admits. He’s not self-conscious about admiring his soul mate. It still boggles his mind that he has one.

“I suppose I understand,” Hunter exaggerates a sigh and moves around the couch so he can sit down. “I just hate losing my kissing companion.”

Sebastian smirks. “What do mean? I can kiss all l want now. Maybe even more often than before.”

Hunter side-eyes him and Sebastian starts to laugh. It’s an earnest, disbelieving, happy laugh that bubbles up much more easily than it ever used to. Blaine glances up from where he’s getting them coffee, having sensed it, a confused smile on his face.

Sebastian watches him approach – the swing of his hips, the curl of his shoulders, the light in his eyes. He tables the latte Blaine hands him in favor of pulling Blaine down onto his lap. Hunter sighs and walks off to give them privacy, but Sebastian doesn’t go in for the assumed kiss. He just tucks his forehead against Blaine’s neck and breathes him in.

“Bas?”

Blaine’s voice is quieted with concern. His hand seems to almost instinctively card through Sebastian’s hair, which only makes Sebastian nuzzle closer. The heartbeat beneath his ear is thundering loudly and tripping irregularly. Probably attributed to butterflies, as he knows Blaine has no issues with PDA (within reason).

“‘m fine,” he mumbles into Blaine’s collarbone, the skin there clamming with his breath.

“You sure?”

The craziest thing is that Blaine could actually check. They’re linked now. They share each other’s emotions. There’s no telepathy – that’s a rare gift anyway – but if they so desire, they can delve pretty deeply into one another’s subconscious to discover secrets and intent. It was a mutual agreement that they wouldn’t do such a thing unless given permission... or truly desperate.

So now, what once was an everyday inquiry is a kindness. A respecting of boundaries between newly fused halves of the same soul.

They want to retain autonomy.

“What’s wrong?” One thing Blaine isn’t, is willing to let things go. Sebastian is still learning how to be more open and honest for him.

“Just overwhelmed I guess.”

Blaine grips the back of his head to pull him away so he can see his eyes. The commanding move sparks something deeper and arousing in Sebastian that he knows he’ll have to explore later. Maybe bust out those handcuffs from his policeman outfit last Halloween...

“Overwhelmed?”

“Grateful,” Sebastian corrects, a wry grin on his face at the way Blaine lights up from the admission.

“Yeah?”

He’s pretty sure he will spend his life trying to convince Blaine how wanted he is. How special he is. The fact that the rest of their life together is a certainty has Sebastian leaning forward again, but this time for that kiss.

“I don’t understand the god who thought I was good enough for you, but I’ll thank him every day we’re together.”

“That’s going to be a lot of thanking,” Blaine teases. He ruffles the scruff of Sebastian’s hair and presses their mouths together hard and fast. Sebastian opens up to him, lips sliding against lips, tongues against tongues.

Kissing is a curious thing now that it’s something he does more than once with the same person.

Whereas before it was a bit perfunctory, a necessity that he learned to enjoy, that he likes to think he got good at – now it’s an exploration. When he curls his tongue over Blaine’s teeth, he isn’t searching for some unknown feeling to overcome his senses, he’s simply enjoying the slip-slide of their mouths and the way his chest rumbles with an visceral moan whenever Blaine takes control and sucks the breath straight from his own lungs.

“Room? Bedroom?” Sebastian gasps between kisses. His hands are inching towards Blaine’s ass almost against his will. But it’s just _there_ , resting so tantalizingly over his thighs. “You should probably resist straddling me in public in the future.”

“You’re the one who pulled me down!”

“Yes, but I’m the weak one. I can’t resist you or this ass.” He grips the soft flesh in question briefly in his hands, for the thrill of the squeeze and the way Blaine has to bite his lip hard so he doesn’t let out an indecent whimper.

“And you think I can?”

“You can’t resist your own ass?” Sebastian cocks an eyebrow. “Not that I can judge...”

“ _Sebastian_ ,” Blaine groans like he knows he’s ridiculous – like he doesn’t care anyway. It’s a sound Sebastian is sure he will become very familiar with over the years.

Blaine suddenly collapses forward and tries to burrow into Sebastian’s chest.

“Oh my god, everyone’s watching–”

“Well of course they are, we’re like free softcore porn–”

“You need to get us out of here... preferably without anyone seeing the front of my slacks.”

“Happy to see me?”

Sebastian laughs over Blaine’s hunched shoulder because, sure enough, the entire room is staring at them. Nick and Jeff are sniggering on a nearby chair, but as they are also two people occupying a space meant for one, he doesn’t feel the sting of it.

“Okay, up we go.” Leveraging himself off the arm of the couch, Sebastian launches himself up. Blaine goes from sitting astride him to latching on like a koala with his legs wrapped tightly around Sebastian’s waist.

“Sebastian!” That’s an indignant yell he definitely won’t mind getting used to.

“We’re going, we’re going.”

Hunter cuffs his shoulder on his way out the door. Sebastian tips his head to him.

“Evenin’ gentlemen.”

“Next time just stay in your room!”

“And miss you all being jealous of me?” Sebastian scoffs. Blaine smacks him upside the head.

Once they’re outside and up the stairs and in their room and laying in their still-rumpled bed, Sebastian nuzzles once more into the hollow of Blaine’s neck. “Thank you.”

“This again? What for?” Blaine strokes his back and kisses his temple and Sebastian thinks he could die happy right then and there if it didn’t mean he’d miss out on so much with the man beneath him.

“For making it so I’m not the jealous one anymore.”

“That’s fate’s doing, not mine.”

“No. You saw me. You thought of me. You cared well before our souls linked.”

Blaine kisses him with a newly born tenderness that Sebastian hopes will age gracefully into a forever kind of affection. There is still a tingle when their lips meet like that very first time. Sebastian’s soul unfurls from deep below and stretches eagerly towards its other half.

 _I’ve found you_ , it says.

_Never leave me._

_I would never,_ _Blaine replies._


End file.
